Some games create atmospheric worlds that attempt to draw you in with moving stories about characters seeking a second chance, or cast you as troubled superheroes who push themselves to the limit to fight evil. Saints Row: The Third is not like those games. Rather, it's the kind of game that gives you weapons called apocafists with which you can punch people, instantly making them explode in a bloody mess. The Third won't impress you with knockout visuals, move you with an absorbing story, or engage you with challenging combat. What it does, better than just about any game before, is embrace the idea of an open world as a place for play, constantly giving you access to awesome new toys and providing you with no shortage of exciting opportunities to use them.
Are you a bad enough cat to protect Saints HQ?
No knowledge of earlier Saints Row games is needed to jump into the insanity of The Third. Following an incredible opening sequence that involves the kind of bank heist that only the Saints can pull off, the gang is transplanted from their hometown of Stilwater to the city of Steelport. As their leader, it's up to you to lead them from upstart newcomers to rulers of the town, which means frequently coming into conflict with the local gangs, the masked Luchadores, stylish Morningstars, and Tron-inspired Deckers. Along the way, you meet some great new characters, like Oleg, a strongman so huge, he can only ride in the bed of pickup trucks and who defies expectations by being learned and philosophical. And at key moments, the action is energized by fitting uses of music; the pounding rhythms of Kanye West's "Power" make a great early set piece even more exciting, for instance, and a fun sing-along between your character and another creates feelings of warmth and camaraderie among the Saints. Occasionally, the game's "anything goes" tone goes a little too far--a mission that uses human trafficking of sex workers as a plot point to support its cartoonish mayhem is one example--but the story typically succeeds at being absurd, goofy fun.
If you choose, you can make it all the more absurd by creating a character who speaks in zombie grunts or wears an animal mascot suit (when he opts to wear anything at all). The number of character customization options is impressive, and there are no restrictions on what elements you combine. If you wish to create a blonde bombshell with a beard or a mean-looking man who sounds like a woman from Eastern Europe, you can. Seeing a man in a sexy cowgirl outfit or a woman wearing a giant Johnny Gat head in cutscenes in which everyone treats him or her as a respected gang boss is hilarious. And if you get bored with your character's current appearance, voice, or outfit, plastic surgery and clothing from the varied boutiques of Steelport cost a pittance, so you can reinvent yourself as often as you please.
This kind of freedom characterizes the entire Saints Row: The Third experience. Previous Saints Row games required you to do activities to earn enough respect to proceed to the next story mission. In The Third, you're never held back from advancing through the story, or from doing just about anything else. From the moment you arrive in Steelport, you have access to an assortment of vehicles to steal for chop shops and targets to assassinate for clients, as well as a tremendous list of challenges you can strive to complete or ignore. Many of these reward you for doing things that you might want to do for fun anyway, like streaking, vehicle surfing, driving in oncoming traffic, catching big air in cars, doing wheelies or stoppies on motorcycles, nailing basejumps, killing people in those creepy mascot outfits, and much, much more. You earn respect for just about everything you do, and as you level up, you gain access to a host of upgrades--health increases, combat abilities, the option to recruit more gang members to follow you around, and much more.
Yes, "more" is the driving philosophy of The Third--more awesome weapons, more amazing vehicles, more really fun stuff to do. The available activities include returning favorites like Insurance Fraud and Mayhem, and a number of great new pursuits. Guardian Angel puts you in a helicopter with a rocket launcher or sniper rifle to protect Saints on the ground. In Tank Mayhem, you must create a certain amount of destruction within a time limit, but you get to do it by harnessing the tremendous firepower of a tank. Professor Genki's Super Ethical Reality Climax is a reality-show gauntlet of deadly traps and deadlier enemies, in which everything is fair game, except shooting pictures of pandas, because as we all know, killing pandas is unethical. With so many opportunities to earn respect, you're totally free to do only those activities you enjoy, and ignore the rest.
One thing you definitely shouldn't ignore is the main story. Within just the first few missions, you plummet out of a plane and into an airborne shoot-out, skydive into a penthouse that belongs to a rival gang, use a UAV drone to call in guided missiles on tanks, and more. The missions eventually become a bit predictable for a while, serving as introductions to the other activities and diversions available to you in Steelport. But before long, they get wild again, packing in numerous surprises before culminating in one of two outrageous final missions. (Don't worry; after experiencing one ending, you have the option of replaying the penultimate mission and making the choice that takes you to the alternate ending.)
